Banana Hammock

In today's Dinette Set, there is only one thing worth saying:

• Dear God! I think they're talking about Jerry's old Speedo.

A reminder: after a panel like this, CDC guidelines are in effect. So if you have been exposed, even mildly, claw your eyes out and seek out the most potent sedative you can find.

The Old Bag

In today's Dinette Set, a company function is the scene of simmering class warfare once again, but the reader is distracted by details:

• Who is that man fleeing the scene?
• Is it possible, by adding some badly needed punctuation, to force the words on the raffle sign into a semblance of meaning recognizable to an English-speaking audience?
  
• Wouldn't a cash bar have, you know, a bartender?
• What, precisely, are those balloons supposed to be anchored to? The sign?
  

Plastic or Melted Plastic?

In today's Dinette Set, Burl and Joy misunderstand the purpose of plastic utensils, leading the reader to mutter out loud:

• It's a wonder people this stupid have a functioning autonomic nervous system. Seriously.
  
• How much did Solo pay for product placement? How much will they sue for when they find out what they got for their marketing dollars?
• "You were smart to use...it will make for?" Could you please pick a damn tense and stick with it?
  

Tom Jones' Roast Beef

In today's Dinette Set, the girls return from a concert and we must:

• Invent a likely scenario which involves Tom Jones kissing members of his audience, rather than just dodging their undergarments.
  
• Struggle to understand why Burl is suggesting that he would wash his face to remove BBQ sauce, unless it rubbed off Tom Jones' face and onto his own.
• Ignore Joy's shirt. Seriously, do not look at it.
  

Can't Happen Soon Enough

In today's Dinette Set, Marlene discusses the end of the world; on the other hand:

• Timmy, once again subjected to emotional abuse at the hands of his grandparents and their neighbors, sports a look of horror appropriate if the situation is to be taken literally, but not appropriate if we are just talking about the demise of the Dinette Set.
• The artist apparently does not believe the reader will understand what a meteor impact might mean, gratuitously splashing death references throughout the panel; always a perscription for comedy gold.

The Mothman Cometh

In today's Dinette Set, the reader is left to wonder:

• When did the Pennys move the phone out of the TV room?
• What are we supposed to make of the fact that Marlene likes to make phone calls during dinner? Is this a comment on Dale and Marlene's relationship?
  
• Has there ever been a more stilted bit of dialog than: "Probably Marlene, who likes to call you while they're eating dinner..."
  
• What exactly is the joke? Is this a joke only comprehensible by non-TiVo-owning readers?
  

Carbon Copy Coffee

In today's Dinette Set, Burl and Joy purchase coffee, causing the reader to wonder:

• Am I supposed to believe for a second that Burl and Joy buy their coffee for $4 at an artsy coffee shop?
• Is the artist afraid to write "Jew's Harp" for fear of being called anti-semitic?
• Does the artist not realize that the College Hill Coffee logo looks completely out of place being a semi photo-realistic style amidst crude line drawings?
  

Update: h/t to pinball for finding the logo which was copied in making this panel.

Tornado Tales

In today's Dinette Set, we gather 'round the TV for some o' Burl's homespun wisdom only to find:

• A prepositional phrase in Burl's dialog that adds nothing whatever to the panel, whereas both the artist and her editor apparently did not notice it.
• Timmy has not changed his shirt since 26 April; and it still doesn't make any sense.
• The artist appears to believe we should consider it funny that Burl is frightened when a tornado passes overhead.
• And yet, the artist appears not to want to discuss the idiocy of being outside during a tornado.

Seafood Scamps

In today's Dinette Set, the kitchen provides a setting where:

• Joy or Verla rudely buries her nose in the paper in an attempt to ignore the other people at the table.
• The author pummels the advertisement versus news joke to death.
• We discover how close the artist is willing to come to an overt discussion of current events.
  

Butts on Stools

In today's Dinette Set, Burl's ass perches atop a stool, while the astute reader:

• Recognizes that the artist made the exact same joke 4 months ago.
• Remains just as appalled now as they were 4 months ago to learn that Burl is a Manager.
  
• Is impressed enough by the "Windows on Mac" joke that you have to assume the artist's intent was not what you think.
• Can't understand the sign regarding sick days and vacation days. Are we to believe there's a company that allows people to use sick days as vacation days? In America?